Today, I’m thankful for divine protection during the night – some very strong storms moved through our area in the middle of the night and I was blissfully unaware of any impending danger! We awoke to the news that a 14 year old boy was killed when a tree fell on his home, so sad. My prayers go out to his family.
I didn’t really want to get up today, but I did – and even went for a walk before sitting down with my Clean Heart Devotional and Journal. I had prayed with the kids at bedtime for protection for this area during the storms that I knew were approaching. There didn’t seem to be much of any kind of damage in the immediate area. My husband called and said he saw a lot of damage and evidence of some wicked stormy weather on his way to work and in the town he works. And I slept peacefully, knowing the Father would protect us. I love that!
This week’s journal entry finds me encouraged on one hand, and yet on the other I am offering up a plea for help to my orderly and efficient Creator.
Again this week, I am pleased and amazed that our home is orderly. It is not Don’t Touch Anything or Else “perfect” – we do actually live here, it’s not just for show. But, clutter is not covering every flat surface, the laundry is not out of control (but will be soon if I don’t get on it today), the kids keep their rooms clean and the bathrooms do not need to be shut down by the health department. The dishes don’t pile up like they used to (even before my husband put in the dishwasher), either. This new home that YHWH has blessed us with feels so clean and spacious, and I just feel so settled here. I think that helps a lot.
I still need my Abba’s help, however. Time management has always been something of a struggle for me. Time is elusive and hard to corral – I guess because I can’t see it, only the evidence of its passing. I’ve once again gone back to my own way of doing things, instead of asking YOU for what my instructions are each day. That brings to mind schedules and routines and planners – things I’ve never been able to implement well for any length of time. The question burning in my mind today is:
“YHWH, I’ve tried various planners and they never work well. What do I do? Yes, I need to start with YOU each day and get my instructions, but unless you fix my mind so I can remember it all, how will I keep track? If schedules and routines are goals, shouldn’t it be written down somewhere so the whole family knows what’s going on?”
I’ve been advised before to quit working against my “natural tendencies”, to quit trying to be something I’m not. I have NEVER been “schedule-y” or “routine-y”, and yet I was made in my Creator’s image. His whole creation is based on a schedule and routine, everything is cyclical. The seasons, the stars in the heavens, life itself. Everything runs as scheduled by YHWH. Am I any different? Shouldn’t I also be operating on a schedule instead of flying by the seat of my pants? What if the reason I’m not schedule-y and routine-y is simply because I was not “trained up in the way I should go” as a child?
I don’t want to try and squeeze myself into someone else’s mold, YHWH made me unique! But, I do want to fit into YHWH’s creation in the way he intended. I feel like a cog in a clockwork that’s all wonky…just spinning around and not really ever connecting with the other cogs around me. Just doing my own thing. And watching time fly by, not doing the things I want to because I don’t have time. Heather is right, though, I don’t make time…because I don’t know how to manage it well.
My children – I don’t want to train them up to be like I’ve been most of my life – chaotic and disorganized and endlessly frustrated. I am running out of time to train up my daughter properly, I have a bit more time with my son, thankfully. I am determined that the things in my childhood and most of my adult life that are unproductive and unhealthy are going to end with me and not pass on to my children. I can only do that with YHWH’s help! So, Abba…HELP!
I found this while unpacking some boxes last week, and I wish I could remember where I found it. If this is yours, please email me (just click on Contact Me at the top of the page) so I can properly credit it to you! I wanted to share it anyway, because it’s really a helpful list. It’s encouraging to read over these rules and realize that I’m pretty much doing them, and guess what – I have an orderly home most days!